I’m writing this to give everyone an update as to what I’ve been doing, and why I haven’t written for months and months now. I tried scrolling through my blog earlier and realised that I barely posted in 2016, and I feel like I need to explain a little why that has been so.
I hope you’re ready for a ride because this post will be really really long. The type of long where I’ll warn first because I think it will almost definitely be over a thousand words. (Update: it is way over a thousand words. But please just bare with me yeah?)
1. What have I been up to in the time that I’ve been missing?
My final year in polytechnic almost drove me over the edge. The modules were tough, the projects were tough, I had barely any time for games. Well, I guess I still did catch several movies here and there, hang around town a little. Of course, there are still several posts on what happened in 2016. Those were the fun times. But I spent most of my time doing work, revising or sleeping.
The latter half of 2016 after my school semester ended, I was actually out on internship. I was working at this real estate agency. The agency is basically a family business, and I don’t know if you guys know this. But family businesses are almost always the hardest place to work in.
I’m not about to pull out the bull that internship kept me really busy, so busy that I couldn’t take time to write a post. It wasn’t that I was busy. There are other reasons why I gradually stopped writing since then. I’ll come back to that with the next point. Right now though, I’ll have you know that the other reason is partly also because I’m lazy.
Contrary to what everyone believes, internship is actually really freaking tiring. I ended up at a company where my job scope is really super narrow. Honest to every freaking person in the world: by the end of my 22 weeks at the company, I felt like I did nothing other than read the newspapers. Thank goodness I’m somewhat a master of BS and I managed to spin rather decent reports and presentations for the internship.
With a little more free time from being at internship comes having more time to spend with friends, be it for dinners or movies. I’ve been there done that. I always look forward to seeing the ‘6:00′ appear on my computer on Fridays because why wouldn’t you go out on a Friday night right? (There are actually many reasons why, but please just humour me.)
So that was what I was up to for the last three months of 2016. The year ended with my family’s impromptu trip to Hong Kong (which is a freaking amazing city!!!)
2017 continued the internship that I was finally done with in February. Some other things happened as well, like my family going to Japan for Lunar New Year and my (finally) becoming a qualified driver. Right now I’m back to being stuck at my parents’ office because they are apparently short of hand. Though I’m really seeing other reasons why that is so.
2. Why did I gradually stop writing?
I’m just gonna shamelessly come out and say this: The very first original reason that I even started a blog (not this blog in particular, but a blog of my own in general) was because I wanted somewhere to rant. I was a really angsty, rebellious child when I was in primary school. And all I really wanted was an outlet to let off the steam that my classmates and family brewed. It didn’t really stop in secondary school either, if I didn’t remember wrongly. Back in the day, most of my posts were angry.
I’m really lazy to search back on the really old posts now, but I would say my posts back in secondary school (it was really SUPER difficult to find now because that was back in 2010) were generally more about my daily life/musings. So the blog kinda became like a public diary.
Graduating from secondary school and I guess looking back at the previous posts, I realised that I haven’t really been doing things right. So I changed it up a little more. I didn’t want to treat this blog like a diary anymore, because I realised ‘oh my freaking goodness, it is probably really not a good idea to let the world knows what you think about your classmates.’ Or at least, I really wanted to do that, change the content of my blog. But it has kinda already became a habit. Which is why there were a lot of posts in 2014. (scrolling through that has been hell.)
In recent years though, it wasn’t just about adopting “do not let people know who you are” but also “stop freaking complaining”. The latter being how I ended up with posts of musings, which is what the types of posts that you’ve been getting for a while now, rather than ‘what happened in the week’ (which was basically what TOTW was all about).
The real backing behind ^ is because I didn’t want to keep a blog that I will look back in 20 years down the road and be like “wow I was such a brat and I was complaining about every little thing that was happening. Such ungratefulness” or get really unhappy when I read the posts in the future because all that I’ve documented presently were all unpleasant stuff. After all, by then, whatever you remember is likely to simply be what’s kept here. It is quite unlikely that I’ll be able to remember everything that happened anyway. So keeping it as positive as possible will help future me live her life better.
So… the real reason behind why I gradually stopped writing… Nothing good has happened in my life, and I stopped reflecting upon incidents which also stopped my musing over life. I know, I’ve had a lot of musings in the past about pretty much everything – love, life, whatever – but that has really stopped after the work majorly kicked in and I barely even have enough time to sleep.
I couldn’t bring positivity to the posts, and I didn’t reflect upon things that I wanted to take on in my life… I stopped writing then.
3. So… What’s next for this blog?
I’ve actually been giving a lot of thought to the direction of this blog. As this blog dies down with lack of content, I have been considering switching things up here.
I have been considering opening a photo blog for quite some time now. The photos that I can post on Instagram without it looking extremely cluttered of old photos is starting to reach its limits. And I happen to end up being the type of person who doesn’t post the photos that I’ve taken on the very day itself. The photos are always backdated, especially photos I’ve taken overseas. It is also because of this that I can’t post every photo I’ve taken anyway.
Hence, the solution of having a photo blog was formed. Photos taken from a specific place/country/trip can be posted in one post rather than many posts that clutters the Instagram profile. Snippets of how the photo happened might also be included, rather than just a simple caption.
I mean, really though, wouldn’t you like to see more of these:
It is most likely the direction that the blog would be heading towards. I highly doubt that I’m going to make it a full fledge photo blog… I highly doubt that I would completely leave writing altogether. It is highly likely that I will write random posts in between.
To everyone who has stayed thus far: I’m really proud of you guys. I really don’t know how you’ve managed to read over a thousand words.
But this post has been long overdue and I finally decided it was time to pull the cord on keeping mum about things.
I’m really unsure as to how many people still continues to read this blog. I do hope that y’all existing readers continue to support because I’m really hoping that better quality content will be posted.
Feel free to drop a comment and let me know what you think about anything (really)!
I have another post planned, and it will be written and uploaded really soon! Until then!