Vicious Cycles.

I actually might not make any sense at all, but anyhoo, please just… bare with me, I guess.


Remember how when we were in school and the teachers always told us not to rush our homework too late into the night and sleep early so that we can be attentive during lesson time in the morning?

This week, I realised that I’ve fallen into that exact thing that they’ve talked about. I don’t think it has even been this bad before, but, it is happening, and every morning when I wake up, I honestly do not feel like going to school.

It all started on Sunday when I stayed up late to complete writing my speech for a presentation yesterday, which went quite okay, I think. So, yes, on Sunday night, I slept at 0130 hours. Yes, I know it may not be late to many people, heck, it’s not even late to me. But, when it comes to sleeping at this hour on a school night, that’s where the problems started coming in. I felt like absolute crap on Monday morning, not to mention, I had a longer than usual Monday due to make up lessons from last week. And, my motivation level by the time I reach home was 10%, because I really don’t even have any energy left to complete anything at all. And yet, I still stayed up to practice my speech for my presentation and to complete my homework for another module. (I was the first to hand up this particular tutorial! xD) So yes, I ended up sleeping past midnight again on Monday night.

Yesterday, due to my own procrastination and poor choice of choosing to have a heavier dinner, I was really sleepy even before I started doing anything. And of course, being the ambitious yet fucking tired me, I started doing half of the tutorial that I was supposed to hand in on Friday. Well, partially because the only day I have left to do that was today, considering the time that I’ll be returning home tomorrow. So, yes, I ended up sleeping past one o’clock in the morning again, partially because I decided to be a filial daughter and hung the clean laundry.

So, yes, three nights in a row I’ve been sleeping way past my usual bedtime and fatigue level… I started seeing the signs of the vicious cycle. In these couple of days, I find that I cannot even pay any attention on any of the lectures or tutorials. Tonight, right after I’m done with this post, I’ll be heading to finish my tutorial for Friday, as well as to read up on my lecture notes. Not to mention, complete those shit that I’ve need to for tomorrow’s IS module. I doubt I’ll be heading to bed early, but… let’s just hope that it’s at lease an hour earlier than the past three nights.


On the other hand, things have been looking slightly higher in school. I realised that… maybe it’s actually me who’s having barriers with them. And… just by changing certain actions of mine… I actually interacted more as well as have a happier day. So… I guess, this is the way to continue on to a better school life?

Ah, and yes, tomorrow’s going to be Thursday! I actually really dislike Thursday mornings because I’ve got to get up half an hour earlier just because my class starts at 8. But it always ends up being great just because I get to relax my mind and body in yoga and to have mini reunion with my secondary school classmates. Plus, not forgetting TM. So, I’m just looking forward to tomorrow and, it’s almost the end of the week! So, LET’S JUST PUSH ON!

I’m actually still really tired, but I’ve got to do what I’ve got to do. Oh! And, Benedict Cumberbatch and his mom is just soooo charming!



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