I thought about this when I was thinking about some other things. I don’t even remember what had led to this topic, but here it is. And more than half of the time, I’m just making things up along the way. So… I don’t know, it might not many any sense at all, as do all my other posts. But, I don’t know, just bare with me. Heh.
It’s only been days since I last blogged, but I thought, since I had a good idea to write about and… It’s the holidays anyway, I’d just write it anyway. I might actually use part of this for one of my speeches. Oh, who knows.
Just stop for a second and think for a bit okay. How much sleep do you get everyday? Do you get about the same number of hours of sleep every night? Do you like going to bed early or late? Do you like getting up early or late?
These were the questions that I suddenly started asking myself. Oh! I think it was one morning when I woke up at 830am and thought why in the world was I awake. I kind of take the idea of going to the reservoir for a walk every morning. So, that morning, I was actually feeling really, really lazy to get up and walk. I don’t know what in the world I did on Monday night. I could have perhaps been up almost the entire night listening to sad Doctor Who soundtracks. Yeah, soundtracks are mah thing.
That’s… totally besides the point. What I was going to say is actually…
An idea has come to my attention that I have a love-hate relationship with sleep. And that it has always been a love-hate relationship even since I was a kid.
I remember back when I was in primary school, when I still watched lame as heck anime and discovered fanfiction for the first time in my life, I stayed up waaaaaay past my bed time to read the cute fluffy fanfics. Well, now thinking back, I really did started young as a fangirl huh. But back to the point… It was super dangerous back then, because the desktop in my home was still functioning, and I don’t really have any reason whatsoever to use my mom’s laptop. And obviously back then, I didn’t own any laptop. So… I had to stay in the study room all night reading fanfics from the desktop. I don’t know how in the world I did that, because now that I think about it, and if I had to do it, I would rather go to sleep. It’s just really, really tough reading from a desktop okay.
So back then, I had the chance of sleeping, but I gave it up for reading fanfics. Yeah, that sounds about right. It’s kind of exactly what I do now too. #whoops.
I remember I used to be one of the first kids who could choose to stay awake and only go to sleep at 5/6am. It’s quite insane, really. But then, I did it. It’s not that I hate sleep or anything. I just prefer to stay up and read fanfics, or watch videos. I think it’s really quite insane though, starting at such a young age.
And then comes now. There are days where I’m so darn bloody tired that I won’t even bother to try staying up because I know, in less than half an hour, I would just fall asleep. Regardless whether I’m sitting on the sofa, sitting on the bed, or at my own study table. I would still bloody fall asleep. So there’s literally no point in that at all. Plus, I just remembered that there were days where I sacrificed using my laptop to study. Yeah, those were the good days where I really worked my arse off to get good grades.
And there’s now. Right now, at this very moment, on these very days while I’m on holiday, that I do not actively go to sleep early. Well, sometimes I do, but mostly I only sleep when it’s past 1am. And in the morning when I wake up, I consciously want to wake up early, but something keeps telling me ‘just close your eyes and relax, it’s okay, you don’t have to get up early’. And then, by the time I find myself awake again, it’s way past 11am. In which I will get very annoyed at, because I somehow hate it when I wake up past 11am. By then I would feel like I’ve wasted my entire morning. And it just infuriates me.
So, back to my original point… I hate sleeping early, but I love getting lots of sleep. I love waking up late, but I hate waking up too late.
Oh just tell me that I’m not the only one who’s like that when it comes to sleep?