Broken.

I’ve never really thought about how much the media has been affecting my life.

But today, as a form of break and a complete excuse to procrastinate my life away, I decided to watch old YouTube videos. I remember the days where I would sit at the table and watch endless videos made by Wong Fu Productions and Kevjumba, the days where I would ignore all my work and binge on YouTube videos too. Some things never really change, do they?

It has always felt like just y’know, two years ago that I did such a thing, lie on the sofa and watch endless videos but when I scrolled through the old videos today, I realised that it has been about four years already.

And thinking back, I don’t remember much about the past four years. To be honest, all I remember is that I was quite a brat, and yet I was quite a nerd too. All I did back then was to study. And maybe have small little library trips with Joanne on Saturdays. Occasionally going out with the girls and having an insane amount of fun because all we do is crack jokes and laugh about everything.

Now, as Olafur Arnald’s Broken from Broadchurch’s soundtrack plays, I realised that every emotion brought out by this song is how I’m feeling now.

Hints of helpless, hints of regrets, hints of happiness, hints of sadness.

The days just went by without me noticing and yet again, I’ve forgotten to cherish the days.

Maybe time has broke on me. Maybe it’s time I work on that.

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