I’ve had an extremely love-hate relationship with sleep since I was young. I guess I started sleeping at ungodly hours during the holidays when I was nine or ten. Now that I think about it, it was pretty insane on my part. I think at that point in time of my life, I thought that was pretty cool – being the person who slept the latest. And frankly, at that time, it didn’t affect me much. I would still be rather energised in the morning, even though I’ve only slept for a few hours in the morning. Last semester break, I still did it – sleep when the sun comes up, living in my own timezone and be okay with that.
More recently though, I find my mind battling between sleep and doing something else (ie. watching anything/reading/etc.). It has been an inner dilemma for some time now, and I still face them now. Every night, there would be a battle between sleep and something else. And often enough, sleep lost.
Especially evident in last semester, I realised that I’ve got issues with sleeping.
It wasn’t that I had insomnia and couldn’t sleep. It was that I slept too easily.
That, generally wouldn’t be much of a problem, seeing as it’s pretty much considered good that I never had to toss and turn in bed at three in the morning trying to get back to sleep these last few years. Sleep would just wash me away, easily.
Except, I wasn’t getting quality sleep.
I would go to sleep at the more or less usual hours that I usually go to bed at, and I would wake up feeling just as tired and washed as the night before. It was ridiculous. My eyes continued feeling tired and refused to focus, my mind refused to function properly and just wanted my body to slam down into a comfortable position and start dozing off. My body battery is broken.
It was becoming so much of a problem that I started going to sleep earlier in the night and waking up later in the night to get my work done. It worked for a few hours, and then my body went back to being extremely tired and my eyes continued to blur up.
It’s a problem, one that I have no clue how to solve. All I can do now is to live with this endless cycle of never having my body battery charged full and living with easily blurred eyes because the number of hours of sleep doesn’t equate to the quality of sleep.
And quite honestly, I need more quality sleep. 😦
/I’m trying to write more, since I’m on semester break… But I’m not quite sure what to write about… So daily posts are rather out of the question. I’ll see how. 🙂 Thanks for supporting!/